The poor hapless duck that happened to be flying overhead when some genius gave the Bearded Wonder a pair of guns.
*10.* An errant pass thrown by Dallas Cowboys’ Tony Romo. How can a team with so much talent be so bad?!
*9.* A late-race case of the “whineys” from Jimmie Johnson and Kyle Busch over Brad Keselowski’s restarts.
*8.* A real sense of apathy by fans, as evidenced by the available seating in the stands.
*7.* Four cases of Miss Terri DeBris landing invisibly on the racetrack.
*6.* Overheard about the “all business” Chad Knaus: “He wouldn’t know a good time if fell out of the sky, landed on his face and started to wiggle!” No confirmation on whether it actually did or did not happen.
*5.* Multiple campaign flyers which promptly stuck to the grilles of the cars, causing them to overheat.
*4.* Denny Hamlin’s hopes of winning a championship.
*3.* An old toupee, thought to have been blown in from the winds of Superstorm Sandy. DNA tests have shown it to belong to Jimmy Spencer.
*2.* The TV ratings, which mysteriously had yet to be reported on Jayski.com as of Tuesday.
*1.* A full-time Cup ride for David Reutimann, starting now and into 2013!
“Contact Jeff Meyer”:https://frontstretch.com/contact/14350/
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