Race Weekend Central

Top 10 Free Agency Deals Carl Edwards Turned Down

10. From Michael Waltrip Racing, a NAPA KnowHow karaoke machine, free with a Michael Waltrip mixtape and brochure: How To Sell Your Sponsors and Annoy People 101.

9. From Richard Petty Motorsports, a check that doesn’t actually bounce… but we can’t guarantee that next month.

8. From Earnhardt Ganassi Racing, one free payback “incident” for any driver of choice, courtesy Juan Pablo Montoya‘s front bumper.

7. From Tommy Baldwin Racing, can be one of the Top 10 Kids Who Eat Free at Golden Corral.

6. From NEMCO Motorsports, a chance to run 500 laps… for the WHOLE year! Bonus incentives for running five laps or less.

5. From Stewart-Haas Racing, a lifetime supply of Burger King along with the “Freshman 15” Carl’s health programs never gave him the chance to gain. Free temper tantrum lessons included.

4. From Penske Racing, Kurt Busch‘s entire pit crew. For some reason, they all immediately volunteered to leave when told they could work for anyone else.

3. From Red Bull Racing, a beautiful, empty 10,000 square-foot race shop in Mooresville, along with a fleet of race-ready Toyotas at bargain prices. Talks cut off when Carl Edwards reminded RBR management they would actually have to pay him, not the other way around.

2. From Hendrick Motorsports, the opportunity to carry Jimmie Johnson‘s jockstrap.

1. From Joey Logano, a free ice cream and a “pretty, pretty, pretty please don’t ruin my career!” Oh wait, he took that one. Was wondering what made the difference with Roush Fenway.

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