10. Kevin Conway to Robby Gordon: Little daily pills to make his NASCAR racing budget larger.
9. The rest of the field to Dale Earnhardt Jr.: The view from the front once in a while.
8. Jeff Burton to Kevin Harvick: A giant, elegantly sculpted finger with no apologies or excuses.
7. Kurt Busch to Jeff Gordon: An autographed album of Pink Floyd’s The Wall.
6. Jeremy Mayfield to Brian France: A burning brown paper bag of… well you know, on his porch with a note saying “Test This!!”
5. Megan France to Brian France: An offer to re-marry (again) or more lawyer bills. His choice.
4. Scott Speed to Kasey Kahne: A ride.
3. Richard Petty to George Gillett: A swift kick in the ass.
2. RPM to AJ Allmendinger and Marcos Ambrose: Either a Cup car to drive in 2011 or a nice card (they’re not sure yet).
1. Jeff Gordon to Jimmie Johnson: A spotter.