10. Hi there, sweetie, what you need in your gizzard is a big ol’ smooch from this here cute lil’ pit lizard!
9. We know it is only practice, the car wasn’t even in trim. But we think you’re slow and you can’t do the job, so we gave your car to him. Smooches, Your Car Owner
8. Remember last year when you wrecked my favorite driver? So do I! I’ll be waiting to pay you back after the race.
Signed, Drunken Fan with Anger Management Issues Who Flunked Second Grade Rhyming
7. So you won a race once, big fat hairy deal. That was so long ago, they still used stone wheels. Love, your replacement
6. Dear driver: Oh how I love you! I came from so very far. If you won’t date me willingly, I will shove you in the trunk of my car. Always and Forever, Your No. 1 Fan
5. Honey, I know you’re busy so I’ll keep this brief, I’m leaving you for your teammate’s crew chief. Kisses, Mrs. Driver
4. Hi there fast fella, I’m just tryin’ to schmooze, give Big Al garage passes, get lifetime tattoos!
3. Dear Crew Chief: It’s Valentine’s Day, do you have to be mine? It’s ALL YOUR fault I got that points fine!
Love, Kasey Kahne, Elliott Sadler, Scott Riggs and Matt Kenseth
2. You crashed me at ‘Dega and dumped me at Lowe’s… so I left a little present in your Gatorade hose. Sincerely, Your Favorite Rival
1. Roses are red, Violets are blue, I’m suspending your crew chief and taking points away, too. Love Always, Brian
The Frontstretch Staff is made up of a group of talented men and women spread out all over the United States and Canada. Residing in 15 states throughout the country, plus Ontario, and widely ranging in age, the staff showcases a wide variety of diverse opinions that will keep you coming back for more week in and week out.