NASCAR on TV this week

Top Ten Ways NASCAR Could Make Drivers Settle Their Differences Off the Track

Both drivers must act more PC than Jimmie Johnson at all times, grow a perfectly groomed beard and get drilled in the back of the head with champagne by Chad Knaus.

10. A boxing ring in the infield—all proceeds from tickets go to charity.

9. Enter them in the Demolition Derby at the county fair.

8. Put them ten feet apart and let them fire water bottles at one another until someone calls “uncle”..

7. Two words: JELL-O wrestling!

6. Tiddly Winks.

5. A cook off … with Chef Ramsay as the judge.

4. Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock. Bazinga!

3. Tie them together for 48 hours. One is the right hand and one is the left hand.

2. Wedgie wars!

1. They have to ride home from the track together … in the back seat of Mike Helton’s car.

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