*10.* Positive; AJ is suspended indefinitely or until Brian France feels he’s “learned his lesson.
*9.* Negative; AJ is instantly re-instated, throws a huge party with noted guests Dale, Jr. and Shane Hmiel, and is invited by Brian to provide samples ‘A’ and ‘B’ The Sequel.
*8.* Negative; NASCAR asserts that the samples were tampered with and suspends AJ anyway.
*7.* Positive; AJ accepts his fate, along with a HUGE payoff from Penske and Ford, retires to mountain villa with his wife allowing Matt Kenseth to take over the #22 Ford.
*6.* Positive; AJ fakes his own death, dyes his eyebrows and resumes his racing career under the name Phil Schiffley.
*5.* Negative; AJ laughs in the face of Brian France and reveals that, as a joke, the original samples were really provided by Jeremy Mayfield.
*4.* Positive; In fact, the ‘B’ sample ends up being way more positive for way more banned substances than sample ‘A’. Further investigation reveals that the ‘B’ was just the first letter for the name on the sample tested… Brian France.
*3.* Inconclusive; Turns out pee DOES have a shelf life after all but it had never even crossed anyone’s mind to find how long that is.
*2.* Negative; The sample does reveal however, the startling fact that AJ is pregnant. Jerry Springer jumps at the chance to sponsor AJ and the two become rich beyond their wildest dreams.
*1.* Inconclusive; Sample ‘B’, along with several others, goes missing after a couple of night-time lab technicians get involved in “water sports” in a more non-traditional way.
“Contact Jeff Meyer”:https://frontstretch.com/contact/14350/
A daily email update (Monday through Friday) providing racing news, commentary, features, and information from Frontstretch.com
We hate spam. Your email address will not be sold or shared with anyone else.