Voices From the Cheap Seats: Questions, Comments & Smart Remarks

On Kurt Busch and sponsorship

In case you hadn’t heard, Kurt Busch ran a new paint scheme last week at Talladega which I found ironically apropos. The elder Busch’s car sported a Ricky Bobby ME paint scheme akin to the movie Talladega Nights.

Whoever came up with this idea is either a) a brilliant marketing genius or b) a very clever hater of Kurt with a big checkbook, or even possibly c) both! Whatever the case, they couldn’t have picked a better man for the role.

Consider, Kurt came roaring into the ranks a brash young man who was winning everything and alienating everyone in the process. He goes on to win the very first-ever Chase championship with a huge powerhouse owner in the sport and then even manages to alienate him as well.

Kurt seemed to mellow a bit from the tutelage of Jimmy Spencer’s fist and mellowed even further, as most men are wont to do, with the acquisition of a smokin’ hot wife. (Smokin’ hot is NOT a prerequisite for a wife to mellow a man as most of us know by the way.)

After a few years of mellowing and just when you thought Kurt might actually turn out to be a pretty cool guy (after all we all had his little brother to pick on) he goes and flies totally off the handle, alienating the media, fans, sponsors and just about anyone else who knows anything about NASCAR.

Oh yeah, his smokin’ hot wife must’ve been alienated too ‘cuz she left him faster than Kurt had been driving his racecar. I doubt however, she is sleeping with his best friend though. Kurt just doesn’t strike me as a man who has one.

Don’t text and drive, says Kasey Kahne

First off, let me say that this is written with no malice toward Kasey Kahne. He is just lending his fame to the endeavor which is a public service announcement to young drivers urging them not to text and drive. Here is a bit of the press release.

To educate young adult drivers about the dangers of texting while driving, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, the State Attorneys General and Consumer Protection Agencies, and the Ad Council revealed new public service advertisements featuring No. 5 – Kasey Kahne.

NHTSA reports that distracted driving is the number one killer of American teens. In 2010, more than 3,000 people were killed and an additional 416,000 were injured due to distracted driving, which includes texting while driving … The PSAs direct audiences to StopTextsStopWrecks.org, a website where teens and young adults can find facts about the impact of texting while driving and tips for how to curb the behavior.

OK, that’s is all fine and dandy, but really? Here’s a better idea. Why don’t we start making an example of anyone caught texting and driving! Throw the book at ANYONE who is caught doing it. First time, suspension. Second time, mandatory jail time! Third time or causing an injury accident while texting … lifetime suspension and jail time.

Does anyone really think that young adults and teens are going to listen to a PSA? They’re TEENS for Bob’s sake! (We’ve covered who Bob may or may not be in past columns.) Remember how we knew everything at that age?

TV sinking to new lows…

After watching an ARCA race the other day, a bit came on one of the many, many NASCAR-related shows on Speed where the announcer was actually interviewing a puppet!

The puppet, I later learned, was named Danny Hammerdropper and had risen to fame by apparently by making a deal with Rick Hendrick to buy the [No.] 88 team and, essentially, Dale Earnhardt Jr. How this all came about, I’m really not sure. I quickly changed the channel and watched something more worthwhile … an infomercial about something or other. I’m no member of MENSA by any means but please, don’t insult what little intelligence I have acquired over the years.

But wait. As I was writing this, I heard from the TV in the other room (how it got back on Speed, I have no clue) the big hype was the ‘aerodynamic advantage’ that Jr had going into the weekend at Talladega. Apparently he shaved off his beard. They never have explained how that makes any difference behind a windshield and a full-face helmet. Perhaps I better stay tuned!

Miss Teri returns!

As evidenced by NASCAR’s recent boasting about how there have been fewer cautions this year, it seemed that even longtime fan, Miss Teri Debris, was losing interest in the sport. That, apparently, is not the case.

According to NASCAR’s vice president of competition, Robin Pemberton, in addition to the plastic water bottle Tony Stewart claims was responsible for the late-race caution at Richmond that dramatically altered the outcome of the race, there was an aluminum object – “a beer can or something” !

Turns out that Miss Teri has not only returned, but she’s drinking now as well. NASCAR could not identify the brand of beer.

So what’s the moral of all this?

Don’t be THAT guy. Don’t text and drive and never ever let your smokin’ hot wife throw her beer cans on the track, no matter what her name is!

Stay off the wall,

Jeff Meyer